DEAR MISS MANNERS: Over time, I’ve traveled across the nation and have seen that the names of sure cities are pronounced in another way by the locals than outsiders. As an illustration, Baltimore turns into “Ball Meer” and New Orleans is “Nor Leens.”
I’m by no means sure which pronunciation I ought to use. If I strive the localized model, then I sound overly acquainted and affected — but, if I pronounce the identify as I'd usually, I really feel that I’m disrespecting native customs.
What’s the correct factor to do?
GENTLE READER: Adopting native pronunciations is extra prone to go unsuitable than proper. You're unlikely to fulfill a local ear, and may even give offense: both for the way you get it unsuitable, or for pretending to be one thing you aren't (native to the area).
On the brilliant facet, Miss Manners assures you that no matter you do, you may be honoring the native customized of embarrassing the vacationer.
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I’ve been pushing aside going to the dentist as a result of I do know the hygienist who cleans enamel does nothing however speak about her private life the entire time you’re caught there.
I do know it sounds imply, however I don’t wish to hear it. Plenty of folks simply blab on about private issues to me, however this can be a medical workplace. She even stated one time that she loves that about her job — all of the speaking. Ugh.
GENTLE READER: Your affordable want to not be handled as a captive viewers by the hygienist is an effective subject for dialogue along with your dentist.
However Miss Manners recommends you not have that dialog while you're within the dental chair: The physician, though limiting dialog to “You'll be able to spit now,” could infer that your grievance is just not actually concerning the hygienist.
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I like utilizing on-line chats for enterprise questions. It’s faster than e mail and higher than sitting on maintain ceaselessly, plus I've a transcript of what was stated.
Nonetheless, ending the chat is complicated. They're taught to write down issues like, “Anything I may show you how to with?” or “Have day.” The previous requires a response, and the second may. Do you finish the chat, or allow them to? For those who finish it, what's a well mannered however unequivocal manner of claiming, “I’m signing off now”?
GENTLE READER: The shortage of a snug rhythm for ending chat periods has been seen by Miss Manners as properly, however the primary guidelines haven't modified.
As you're the buyer, it's as much as you to verify that the explanation in your name has been addressed. “No, thanks. Goodbye” is an satisfactory response to the primary possibility, and “Thanks, goodbye” to the second. You'll, nonetheless, must have the braveness of your convictions by then signing off.
DEAR MISS MANNERS: Is it correct to decide on a restaurant that you simply like, somewhat than asking the pal her choice?
GENTLE READER: Why can’t you do each? Assuming, after all, that you simply want to see her once more.
Please ship your inquiries to Miss Manners at her web site, www.missmanners.com; to her e mail, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or by way of postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas Metropolis, MO 64106.