DEAR MISS MANNERS: I'm irked at the usage of the phrase “you’re advantageous.”
It appears to be used within the context of reassuring me that I haven’t carried out something unsuitable, however typically in a scenario by which they have.
For instance, if somebody is obstructing the aisle within the grocery, and I politely say, “Excuse me,” they may transfer however reply with “You’re advantageous.”
Or, once I defined to a buyer that she would want her ID to resume her membership card, she stated that she would want to exit to her automotive to get it. I reiterated that she would want to carry the ID in, and I obtained a response of “You’re advantageous.”
Maybe that is the millennial model of what Miss Manners refers to as a conference. Am I being too prickly?
GENTLE READER: No, you’re advantageous.
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I'm a feminine medical skilled. I counsel sufferers on dietary and dietary issues referring to their efforts to shed weight for well being causes. I additionally occur to be naturally fairly slender.
Often once I meet a affected person (most of whom are ladies), she's going to remark, “You’re so skinny!” Or, in the middle of a session, “Nicely, I’ll by no means appear like you!”
These well-meant remarks make me really feel awkward and intervene with my skill to construct rapport. I often simply weakly smile, mumble one thing like, “Nicely, you realize …” and attempt to return to the subject at hand.
Are you able to recommend a greater solution to deal with these pointless feedback?
GENTLE READER: “We're every on our personal path to good well being, and it's pointless to make comparisons. Let’s focus as an alternative on you and your distinctive objectives.”
Out of compassion, nevertheless, Miss Manners suggests that you just chorus from emphasizing your personal success by not consuming a complete pie in entrance of those girls.
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I'm pregnant with my second baby and wish to have a celebration to have fun this.
I missed out on a child bathe with my first. I used to be hospitalized at six months and had my son a month later (two months early), so he was within the hospital for some time. Fortunately he's very wholesome, but it surely was very tough for some time, and we by no means had a bathe.
I might actually like to have that have and am not thinking about presents, only a celebration.
Would this be cheesy? And the way would I phrase an invite to convey it is a celebration and never about presents?
GENTLE READER: What you might be describing just isn't a bathe — one mustn't bathe oneself — however extra of an arrival celebration.
Miss Manners due to this fact suggests you wait till the infant’s arrival to do it. The invitation could also be worded, “Please come to fulfill our new daughter, Willow Grace, on Sunday, August 7, 10 a.m. to 2 p.m.”
Your visitors will most likely carry presents anyway, but it surely is not going to really feel fairly so obligatory as at a bathe.
Please ship your inquiries to Miss Manners at her web site, www.missmanners.com; to her e-mail, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or by postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas Metropolis, MO 64106.